Ghosts from Our Past A.K.A The Ghostbusters Movie Tie-In

There's just one question you gotta ask yourself before you read this book... Are you a HUGE Ghostbusters nerd? Seriously. Do you live, eat, and breathe for the new Ghostbusters movie? Because I get a sneaking suspicion that having merely "liked" the new movie will not be enough to get you through this.
As you may have already surmised, I am not a HUGE Ghostbusters nerd. I am a fan of the original movies, but was unable to see the new one. But then I saw that Blogging for Books had this available, and since I couldn't convince my significant other to go see the movie with me, I figured I would read this instead. Blogging for Books graciously acquiesced to sending me a free copy (in exchange for a fair and honest review, of course), and here we are now— about 3 or 4 months after I received it.

Okay, here's the thing: This is not a bad book. I've certainly read much worse. But I've also read much better. I guess that, once again, this falls under the category of books that just weren't meant for me. Since I did not see the movie, I'm not sure if this book actually shows up in it. However, the basic premise of Ghosts from Our Past is that ghostbusters Erin Gilbert and Abby Yates (the characters in the movie) wrote it together while they were undergraduates in college. The book is split into three basic parts: Ghostbuster backstories (or how Erin and Abby got into spooks), their research, and their methods. I made it as far as the methods section before I gave up. Honestly, I think the biggest issue I had with this book was its length. It isn't nearly as bloated as Les Miserables, but I would've been happier with fewer pages in their research and methods section. But I'll explain that further soon.

Let's move on to the fun stuff in Ghosts of Our Past. A lot of the humor in this book works because it's meta. This is written as though Erin Gilbert and Abby Yates are real people who legitimately believe in and hunt ghosts. They are "real," and their research is "real," and they passionately try to explain it to you. As a reader, I wasn't just reading a fictional book based on a movie. I was handling an artifact from another dimension, and my guides to that dimension were a couple of passionate, kooky, spook hunters who love the X-files and have no clue how to write a scientific report. The very first page made me laugh with the included praise from diverse sources like New York City's mayor ("An imaginative work of fiction, written by two women I have most definitely never met. Are you recording this? Turn that off."), and an Amazon review that simply read, "5 stars. Arrived on time. Good condition." If you read this book, don't skip the captions. They are funny.

And now that I've had a little bit of time to explain to you what's good about the book, let me go back to what isn't: the pacing. I know earlier I said it was the length, but this isn't that long of a book. The pacing is what's really off. It starts out pretty funny, keeps that momentum through the back stories, and starts losing steam around the middle. That's why it took me so long to get to the third portion. It really slowed down toward the middle, and I just never felt it pick up that pace again toward the end. Then I gave up. Chances are that I will eventually finish reading this book. My bookmark is still where I left it. Overall, I'd say this is good bathroom reading material, but that's about as good as it will ever get.

A Christmas Carol (The Coloring Book)

Oh damn! Christmas is over, and now I show up with something holiday themed? I just can't seem to get my act together this year... Sorry guys!

Actually... HA!— joke's on you, because I'm Puerto Rican! And to us, Christmas lasts through the first week of January and then some! So prepare yourselves for: Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol: A Coloring Classic.

First things first: I realize I've reviewed many coloring books this past year. With so many available and being marketed to adults, my childhood passion for hoarding these was rekindled. As a kid, I had tons of coloring books, but I rarely colored. Instead, I copied the pages and used them as references. I was terrified of messing up the artwork. As an adult, I have so many hobbies that I rarely have time to actually color the artwork. Let's face it, there are plenty of other things that need to get done— like the laundry. Sometimes, I consider coloring and end up drawing and painting instead. But I still love these books, so my hoard continues to grow.

Most recently, I acquired A Christmas Carol: A Coloring Classic from a friend who is not a fan of it and wanted to re-gift it. I feel a little bad for this book because it seems to me that it would have a pretty small, potential fan-base. Really, who thought this was a good idea? In order to enjoy this book to the fullest, I imagine you have to be a fan of Dickens' A Christmas Carol, coloring books, and coloring in people. I have a preference for coloring animals, patterns, and anime characters, so this doesn't totally suit my tastes.

However, the illustrations are done well and detailed. The pages are double-sided, but fairly thick. You can probably get away with using markers, assuming you don't color over the same spot repeatedly. I think colored pencils would be a better option, though, to be safe. Surprisingly, what this book contains the most of are pictures of people— generally in the form of scenes from the story with accompanying quotes— and images of food. Prepare to be hungry after coloring this in. Also, while it does contain some abstract-ish images (food floating in space, for example), there are no repetitious "wallpaper" pattern images. Overall, I think it's a good variety of images to keep your interest. Assuming, of course, that you're interested in coloring A Christmas Carol.

I think what might draw people to this book initially is the beautiful cover: a profusion of flowers, holly, bells, and candles on a red foil background— and Scrooge on the top left corner. Honestly, the cover has caught my attention on more than one occasion in stores. But then I see A Christmas Carol and move on with nary more than a "meh" towards it. Ultimately, not my kind of coloring book. But if you're really into A Christmas Carol, coloring, and great artwork, you'll definitely enjoy this book!

Halloween Freebies!

I'm currently working at a Halloween City. I could've started blogging about Halloween in August.

Hey guys! I just wanted to point you towards some books I found free on Amazon. No particular reason other than "people like free stuff, right?" Some of these books I have read before, and others I'm going to try out this month. Care to read with me?

I mentioned How to be Dead to you last year on Halloween, then I went on to read it. You know what? It was hilarious, and I loved it. The first book is still free on Amazon, and the second book— Paper Cuts— is well worth the $2.99. They're short, horror comedies and you really can't go wrong with them. I'll probably review these two sooner rather than later. The only thing that bugs me is that there is a third book in the works, and it isn't finished yet. So I'm bummed about that, but these two are still so worth your time.

Did you know that a metric butt-ton of classics are available for free on Amazon, if you're getting them on Kindle? I mention it because I forget all the time. Since Kindle is my digital platform of choice, I started loading it up with all kinds of stuff for the season, including: Frankenstein, Dracula, The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, and War of the Worlds. If you've read them before: good for you! I read Frankenstein in high school, and Dracula during college. Though they both started slow, they got much better. I was even able to get over having to read in the dreaded first person perspective during Dracula. Before the month is done, I hope to get around to The Picture of Dorian Gray, and Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I'm one of those people that likes getting around to the classics. It gives me more meme material.

I hope this will keep you all satisfied for a couple of days at least. Enjoy! And if you have a minute, leave me a comment with what your reading list looks like for this month. I like getting recommendations too, you know!

Hello, Bicycle: A love letter on two wheels

Mango and I went to the e-cycle place in town to get rid of an old scanner,
then treated ourselves with a trip to the library!

My husband spoils me: for my birthday he bought me a shiny new bike. Though I originally intended to get a folding bike (for easy storing and getting around town), the folks at our local bike shop pointed out this beauty and I fell in love with it. I call her "Mango," and I take her out for rides as often as possible. Though Mango and I are probably in the honeymoon phase of our relationship, it is clear that Anna Brones and her bike are not. She obviously has a deep, abiding love for her two-wheeled conveyance. Hello Bicycle is clearly her love letter to bicycles with added useful information to their riders.

You are a woman of strange passions...
I am a woman of varied passions, that's all. And bicycling is now one of them! I requested Hello Bicycle from Blogging for Books— in exchange for an honest and fair review, of course— because it promised a "practical guide to the bike life with real-world advice" which I hoped included how to fix a flat tire. Honestly, I wasn't sure what to expect beyond that, and I was happy that I got it! I suspect Anna Brones is a woman of varied passions as well, since she includes more than just bike history, maintenance, and various reasons you should dust off your bike and get pedaling. Were you wondering what you could do with a bicycle beyond going for a joy ride? Ultimately we ride because we want to and it's enjoyable, but had you considered other possible biking adventures like camping, touring, or just commuting? And how will you remain fueled? Brones includes snack recipes to keep you pedaling, gear that might make your life easier if you want your two-wheeled steed to be as utilitarian as possible (or you want to go touring), and even up-cycle projects you can do when you inevitably get a flat tire (or two) and can no longer patch the tubes in your tires. All of that and more in a short book that you could read in an afternoon!

Overall, I would classify this book as a good, beginner "bike info sampler." You can tell with every sentence that Brones loves her cycling. She gives compelling reasons to add cycling to our everyday lives, as well as points out how easy it would be. If you haven't been on a bike since you were a kid, but you want to get back into it: this would be a good book for you. You'll get help figuring out what you need in a bike and additional resources to check out. If you're looking for something with more technical jargon, move along.

The Cruelty: Red-headed stepchild of the YA genre

I will find you... And I will read you. On 2/17/17

People who read my blog, take note: I am a bibliophile. You probably gathered as much from the fact that I have a book review blog that I post in on a mostly regular basis. Still, I wanted to preface the following review with that statement, so you would understand just how I came to possess a copy of Scott Bergstrom's The Cruelty. I love books, and if a print copy of something should be offered to me for free, well... How could I say "no"? It had everything to do with wanting a new book, and nothing with the fact that it's "young adult" fiction or that the plot is essentially reverse-Taken.

It's "reverse Taken"...?

Yes: a loved one is kidnapped by terrorists/mobsters/criminals that are involved with human trafficking and our heroic protagonist must save them. It just so happens that this time, the daughter has to go save her kidnapped father instead of the other way around. Dad's been damseled, but everything else is very similar.

Our heroine, Gwendolyn Bloom, is the seventeen-year-old daughter of a kidnapped diplomat, and she has tough choices ahead of her. Terrorists rarely pick the best time to kidnap one's family, and for Gwendolyn they chose the day after the tenth anniversary of her mother's murder. With one parent already brutally slain, Gwendolyn won't let the other go. The choices she faces begin benignly enough: will she go meekly to live with a distant relative she doesn't know and accept that the authorities are doing everything in their power to rescue her father— the only family she's ever really known? Or will she wrest control of the situation and do everything she can to get him back? I don't think we'd get much of a book if she'd done the former— "well-behaved women seldom make history" (L.T. Ulrich) and all that jazz. From that point forward, Bergstrom sets the narrative on cruise control in the "action packed novel" lane, complete with training sessions (where Gwendolyn emerges as a teenage badass capable of defending herself against anything after a month of intense training), breaking and entering, murder, even picking up on a cold trail in a missing person's case through Europe (which is where her dad disappeared).

That sounds intense!

It's predictable, yet satisfying. Except for a slow start— potentially a case of "first novel syndrome"— the writing was interesting and well-paced. I only wish that I'd actually been in the mood to read it, and that it weren't in the first person point of view because I find that irritating— both of which are personal problems and not the book's fault. It also didn't help that this was the third version of the Taken-plot I've read in the past month. (That was purely accidental, by the way.) But if you don't share my personal problems and you're a fan of action-packed, young adult thrillers drizzled with murder, you'll probably like this book.

There were a few things that pulled me out of the action. They mainly had to do with the aforementioned "first person perspective." That and I find it hard to believe any normal, "soft" 17-year-old could do this kind of stuff: leave the comforts of home only to get her ass handed to her repeatedly until she learns to destroy everything in her path. Still, it made for a good story.

Wait, how is this the red-headed stepchild of the YA genre?

Ah, that... Apparently the author made some disparaging remarks regarding young adult fiction, its writers, and audience in general. Or at least, he made remarks and they were taken very personally by the audience. If you google his name and the name of the book, it's practically the first thing that pops up. I mention this because I think the negative reaction is exaggerated— especially when people are rating the book like crap even if they haven't even read it purely because Bergstrom made some ignorant remarks.

I did receive a free copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Pop Manga Coloring Book: Made of Manga & WIN

Holy crapsicles, Batman! Another coloring book!

You guys, I'm so excited! My copy of Pop Manga Coloring Book arrived and I'm thrilled beyond belief! At first I wanted it because it was another coloring book, but now that I've had a chance to experience the artwork— I'm in love. Not bad for having picked this up for free from Blogging For Books (in exchange for an honest and fair review, of course). This is officially my new favorite coloring book! Camilla d'Errico perfectly summarizes the book in her title caption: "A surreal journey through a cute, curious, bizarre, and beautiful world."

So half of this review is done for you!
Not necessarily— I do have other things to say about it! Pop Manga Coloring Book includes a mix of clean-line, inked images and other sketchier, "fancy pencil drawings" images. d'Errico also supplies a little color buddy/blob throughout the book named Ayako to provide commentary and moral support. Mostly it says fun, silly reminders about how you're allowed to color outside of the lines if you want, and that you can use any coloring implement you'd like to color in this book. I think Camilla d'Errico understands that sometimes, when an image is beautiful, people might get anxious about coloring it in and "messing it up." She even goes so far as to say that you're allowed to photocopy the pages and practice beforehand if that's you're kind of thing. I know people who do that, but this is the first time I've seen an artist actually suggest it. All the pages are double-sided, and thick enough that markers might not bleed through to the other side; I haven't been able to test that out yet, though.

The surrealism also varies widely, ranging from an image that looks like a melting blob of would-be colors with a face to illustrations from potential comics, stories, or fairy tales. I say "potential stories" because I don't think they are pulled from any coherent manga, but my imagination certainly supplied a few story ideas for the illustrations. Speaking of "manga," it should be fairly obvious that if you're not into the Japanese comic book illustration style, this book is probably not for you. With a name like "Pop Manga," I hope that didn't come as a surprise.

Overall, this is a beautiful book. If you're into the manga style of art and you like coloring, I highly recommend it! I love it so much, I would happily pay money for it!

The Rooftop Growing Guide

Another gardening book?

Yep! I'm pretending to be a Sim, in the hopes that reading enough books about a subject will transform me into a master gardener before I ever touch dirt. Remember, I'm also working from a disadvantage: ignorance in gardening presents itself first as a black thumb. At least I'm hoping it's my ignorance of proper gardening techniques that murders the plants, and not a genetic predisposition to screwing up green spaces. 

Originally, I ordered this book to help me with my container garden, because obviously a rooftop garden means a container garden on the roof. At least, that's what I thought. I was pleasantly surprised to learn that is not always the case! It should've been obvious to me from the title and picture on the cover, but Annie Novak meant nothing so small as a container when she wrote this book. After all, look at the flat roof on that building and the size of the plants atop it!

I think this book is aimed primarily at people living in dense urban zones where there aren't many green spaces. Basically, since real estate is scarce and high cost, they instead turn to their roofs. It makes sense, really. On the roof of a building, you don't have to worry as much about whether your building or the next is perpetually casting shade over your plants, or if you have enough space in your tiny backyard to plant all you want. What if you want to plant something in particular, but the soil conditions in your area are not optimal for your new green darling? Rooftop gardening is the perfect opportunity to create your own optimal growing settings.

If only it were as easy as seeds + dirt + water. My strawberries
refuse to grow, and it makes me sad!

Before you get to thinking that it's as easy as throwing some dirt on your roof and some seeds on top of that, let me just tell you: No, not quite. It is still gardening, but with a few twists! These include whether or not your roof can even properly support a garden! Let's face it, buildings are made to sustain a certain amount of weight. Soil, plants with their roots, and especially the water intended to make everything grow, is likely to add weight the building may not support. That issue is fairly straightforward, but also stop to think about how you'll irrigate your rooftop garden, or how the roof microclimate will affect your plants! Yeah, I went there: I said "microclimate." No, rooftop gardening is decidedly not as straightforward as tossing some dirt and seeds up there and hoping for the best.

At this point, you're probably wishing I'd just get to the point and tell you how it would benefit you to get this book. First and foremost: Do you have a flat roof to grow things on? If you do, you will find this book interesting and helpful, whether you intend to have a small herb garden or a full-blown farm. The writing is engaging, and Novak has anecdotes from other rooftop gardeners to augment her own knowledge. Chances are that if you have a question, she will likely address it or has some other resource to offer. She covers topics ranging from assessing your rooftop —can I even grow here?— and pests, to choosing whether to grow in containers or greenhouses, or green roofs. And of course, there is also the ever present chapter on planning your garden. Yes, if I've learned anything from all these gardening books, it's that besides remembering to actually water your plants, the most important thing you can do is to plan your garden.

However, since I do not have a flat roof on which to grow things, I found The Rooftop Growing Guide to be theoretically interesting, but ultimately impractical. A more general gardening book would have suited me better, but that is not Annie Novak's fault. So if you have a flat roof, I absolutely recommend this book. And if you don't, you might still find it interesting to read.

I received a complimentary copy of The Rooftop Growing Guide from Blogging for Books in exchange for a fair and honest review.

The Water-Saving Garden: Because weather doesn't always happen in California

Fun fact: the state of California has every type of climate in the world except for tropical. Pretty cool, huh? That means if you travel a few hours in any direction, you'll find yourself in a different climate than where you started without even needing to leave the state. Unfortunately, for the last several years, we've been suffering through a severe drought. This makes me nervous: I've never wanted to live in the desert. My favorite color is green, not brown, and I love playing in water. So water conservation is high on my list of priorities. The Water-Saving Garden, by Pam Penick, is a book I picked up for free from Blogging for Books (in exchange for a fair and honest review), in the hopes of cultivating a kick-ass garden without wasting water. Let me tell you a thing or five about what I've learned...

The Water-Saving Garden is broken up into five different parts: inspiration, retaining water, planting, making you see things that aren't there, and recommended plants. That is a lot to pack into one book, but Penick does a great job of it. The inspiration portion features multiple gardens and highlights the different features that make them drought resistant. This portion is more photos than text, but it's a great way to start— giving you ideas as to what is possible.

My favorite parts in this book are probably the second part and third parts: retaining and planting. Basically: plan your garden. Before reading this book, I hadn't thought that planning a garden was more than deciding what plants to put in the ground or where I would place them relative to each other. That is certainly part of it, but you also want to consider how you can make it an inviting or relaxing space to be in, how you're going to water it, and how you can retain the maximum amount of rainfall on your property. Are you interested in holding rainwater to use during dry spells? There's a section for that in this book. What about preventing that rain from just going down the gutter and instead replenishing the ground water? That's in here too! I want to say that the basic premise of this book is: don't just reduce the amount of water you throw outside from your taps. Tap into the water that's already in the ground!

Thirdly, a chance to get dirty: Plant your garden!

So now you have a bunch of cacti planted in your yard so you won't have to water them?

Actually, right now I have a patch of dirt that needs to be cleared of debris. But to your insinuation that I would have a yard full of cacti I say, “Hah!” And no. While cacti and other succulents are certainly water thrifty plants, they are absolutely not the only choice available if you want to conserve water in your garden. You know what isn't really a choice in this type of garden? Lawns.

Lawns are the Humvees of the plant world —they're resource guzzlers, require a lot of time and maintenance, and don't look all that great anyway.

GASP! How can you say that about lawns?! It's the American way!

I know a lot of people picture a house with a white picket fence and a beautiful lawn as an integral part of the American dream but I think we can do better. There are other ways of doing things! And like it or not, the fact remains that during a drought, your lawn is going to wither and die because the roots just don't grow deep enough. They require a lot of water, you have to mow them frequently, they get weedy if you blink at them — they are just a lot more work than they're worth. If your main goal is to conserve water: lose the lawn. If you can't bear to lose the lawn, reduce it. If you decide to install artificial turf, lose my number.

Wanna tell us how you really feel about fake grass?

That's a post for a different day and a different blog. My point is that lawn is boring, lacks creativity, and takes a lot of effort for not much pay-off. There are alternative grasses and ground covers available to create visual interest, that thrive on less water, and give you an open green space if that's what you're after. There are wildflowers, trees, shrubs, and ground covers that are drought hardy. It doesn't have to all be about cacti or other succulents: we have options if we take the time to find them. I suppose that's the biggest deterrent for a lot of people having a garden instead of a lawn. You can set a lawn down and it looks like a lawn right away, but it takes more maintenance time later on. It might take you more time upfront to plan and set up a drought-hardy garden, but it will mostly take care of itself afterward. After all, it's meant to thrive on the amount of water that falls from the sky instead of you hosing it down.

What about this “making you see things that aren't there” section?

The section is actually about creating the illusion of water where there may not be any. This can be achieved by using stones, cascading plants, a simple water feature, etc. — anything that evokes an image of lakes, the sea, or other water by using plants.

The final section in this book is dedicated to 101 plants for water-saving gardens. Because like puppies, 100 just isn't enough. Gotta throw in that extra one.

And there you have it! The Water-Saving Garden: How to grow a gorgeous garden with a lot less water by Pam Penick is 223 pages of beautifully illustrated advice on how to grow a garden while conserving resources. If you have any aspirations toward creating an inviting outdoor space, I highly recommend it!

The Bee-Friendly Garden

Click here to find me on Amazon!

I have far too many hobbies. Along with reading and reviewing books, I also crochet, draw, write, and sometimes I try to garden. Unfortunately, I suck at it. If you don't think that keeping a plant alive is particularly difficult, just hand it to me and I'll happily demonstrate. 

Maybe it's something about your karma?

Let's not get personal. Maybe I know nothing about the proper conditions to keep a thing alive in a pot. However, I do know how to read, and I'm not so terrible at research. One of my motto's is "When in doubt: READ A BOOK!"

You don't just watch a youtube video?

I do that too, but it doesn't fit the theme today, and for this particular hobby I would literally be watching grass grow. I picked up The bee-friendly Garden from Blogging for Books in exchange for a fair and honest review. As someone who loves honey and is concerned about the decline in bee populations, I thought this book could help me choose appropriate, hardy, plants that would survive my black thumb while also providing nutrients for our friends the bees.

Speaking of our friends the bees—I had no idea there were so many different kinds! Typically, when I think of bees, I picture bumblebees and think they're also honeybees, but those are actually distinct species. You know where I learned that? From this book!

Duh...

Hey, I was expecting a lot of information about plants that attract bees and maybe how to design your garden. That is included in here, but there's so much more to it! The first chapter is dedicated to various bee profiles: their genus and species, common names, habitats, and their preferred types of flowers (because bees have favorite foods too). Chapters two and three talk about the different plants you can include in your bee-friendly garden. We're not just talking flowers, either. The main point I pulled from this book is that in order to have a healthy garden for healthy bees, variety is key. Variety of plants—annuals, perennials, shrubs, and trees—will extend the length of time your garden blooms, thus providing nourishment for your friendly neighborhood bees for longer. Authors Kate Frey and Gretchen LeBuhn also stress the importance of including native plants in your garden. These make it likelier that local bees will visit (and pollinate) your plants, but also increases the health of your garden. Local plants, if you think about it, are hardy weeds we like. They'll make it less likely for weeds we don't like to take over our garden areas.

Did you start your bee-friendly garden yet?

As previously mentioned, I have something of a black thumb. You have to look really close, because generally my thumb looks peach, but the point is that it isn't green. So, I have yet to start my garden. However, I intend to plan it using the the regional lists of plants and the section for "designing your garden." So that's in the works. I'd love to show you all pictures of my beautiful, living garden when I make it happen, but that'll be a while.

Obviously you really like this book. Will I?

Quite possibly. You may want to buy a copy of this book if:

1. You enjoy gardening and want to help improve bee populations
2. You like flowers or food
3. Beautiful pictures of outdoor landscapes make you happy
4. Or maybe you just want to learn more about bees, their habitats, and what sorts of plants will draw them in.

There you have it! The bee-friendly Garden: I'm happy to have it and I think you would be too!

What is this shit? Sentence of Marriage

The story of how rape and
abuse is all the victim's fault.

Why don't you tell us how you really feel?

I'm getting to it. GoodReads has this great feature where you can make multiple “shelves” for your books and name them as you please. Sentence of Marriage deserves its very own shelf. I named it “Fucked Up.”

I downloaded this book because it was free, it had a rating of at least three stars, and it was recommended to me as a “historical romance.” That was a goddamn lie. There is nothing romantic about this story. Historical? Maybe. Romantic? Nope. I call bullshit on that claim.

Wow, it appears you feel rather strongly about this.

You're goddamn right I do. It isn't often that I am sorry to have read something, but maybe I wouldn't be so angry with it if the synopses had painted a more realistic picture of what the story was going to be like. I mean, just look at it!

“In nineteenth century New Zealand, there are few choices for a farm girl like Amy. Her life seems mapped out for her by the time she is twelve. Amy dreams of an exciting life in the world beyond her narrow boundaries. But it is the two people who come to the farm from outside the valley who change her life forever, and Amy learns the high cost of making the wrong choice.”

A more appropriate synopses would have read:

“When her father unexpectedly marries a twit, 12-year-old Amy tries to make the best of a poor situation by showing kindness to her new stepmother. In return, her new mother showers Amy with contempt and emotional abuse. At the tender age of 15, Amy's new uncle (her stepmother's brother) sexually assaults her while visiting the family. After repeated promises of matrimony intended to coerce her into gratifying him, he runs away to Australia when he discovers she is pregnant. Can Amy surpass these hardships and lead a life she can still be proud of?”

Spoilers: The answer is “No.” Maybe you can start to see why I'm upset with this book. The actual synopses implies that someone with the ability to make a choice makes an unwise decision and must then face the consequences. In actuality, a teenage girl has no choice in what happens to her, is brainwashed into believing that she consented to having sex (She didn't. She very clearly said “no”), and then must suffer the consequences of her new status as a “sullied woman,” a broken object now devoid of worth. At one point in the story, her rapist (a twenty-something-year-old good-for-nothing posing as a gentleman), mentions that perhaps Amy should allow him to speak to her father before she goes mentioning anything about what “they” did (like she had any choice). Because, of course, he'll ask her father for her hand in marriage and they'll live happily ever after, and Amy wouldn't want her dad to break his arms, would she? Well, she didn't. But I did. So I continued reading, hoping.

She didn't want her father to break his arms? Why not?!

Sometimes authors do horrible things to their characters, then try to make up for it later in the story. One of the many horrible things Shayne Parkinson subjected our naive teenager to was having her fall in love with the man who would rape her. So after the rape occurred, the rapist convinced Amy that he had merely gotten carried away and it was all moot point because he intended to marry her. They only got a little ahead of themselves! And so, convinced that this was merely a lapse in judgment on his part and that he fully intended to marry her (and soon), Amy told no one what happened.

Wow... That's a terrible story!

It is. But it keeps going, and it gets worse

You're fucking kidding me...

I wish I were. You see, it's bad now, right? But then Ms. Parkinson refuses to satisfy our ensuing bloodlust, and instead proceeds to continue with the deliberate torture of a minor. Amy has her baby. Amy's baby is taken away. Amy gets married off to a much older man she has been terrified of her entire life in an attempt to salvage her and her family's name (despite the fact that her older brothers and her cousin beg her not to go through with it). This is bad, yes? The rest of the book, Amy is beaten and raped by her new husband. This was worse. At the end of the first book, she is pregnant by the monster she married.

Not a single good thing happened in this book. This was not a romance novel. It's the story of how a minor is put through hell and it doesn't matter that she's a good person. Her life is misery, and her abusers can carry on as they please. If I had wanted to read that story, I would've flipped through the news. If there was a poor choice on Amy's part, it was not committing suicide and ending her torture. (Actually, it was probably her decision to delay telling her father that she was pregnant, but that one is understandable.)

Apparently, there are people out there who think this is a good book. I even read a few reviews where people stated that this was a good book and that they enjoyed it. To those people I say, “I beg your fucking pardon?” What is enjoyable about a little girl getting raped and beaten? I am gobsmacked at the number of good reviews this atrocity received. As historical fiction, it might work. As drama, it might work. As a romance novel? No. Technically, the book is legible. Parkinson's writing works, the descriptions paint their pictures of horror terrifyingly well. It's just too bad the subject matter was so awful.

This is the first book in a series, and I downloaded it for free. I have never been so sorry to have read a story. I would actively discourage anyone from reading this.

Scattered like litter on the floor: Cats in Paris

Cats in Paris: A Coloring Book of the Felines of Paris by Won-Sun Jang

My rating: 2 of 5 stars


"I have a great concept for a coloring book!" said the artist.
"Oh? And what is that?" queried the publisher.
"Cats!"
"That's nice, but cats have been done. Can you throw anything else in there?"
"...Paris?"
"That sounds great!"
"But, I don't have a lot of drawings of Paris, so how about we just do whatever with cats and say it's in Paris?"
"Sure, that'll work too."
And that, I think, sums up what went into this book. There are cats all over it, so that wasn't a lie. But there's very little of Paris in it. The art style also changes wildly throughout the book. There were actually three distinct art-styles throughout. The first portion of it we'll call "sketch jazz ugly."

During the sketch jazz ugly portion, the illustrations are sketchy with some bits of dialogue included where a supposedly Parisian cat shows you his favorite sketched-out Paris haunts. It's as weird as I just described it. This portion of the book lasts for about the first 16 pages before it moves on to the next style, "Sketch jazz real." The illustrations from here forward are much nicer than the initial ugly jazz stage, but continue to be "sketchy." I think there may be two clean lines in this entire book. In any case, during the middle portion there are more varied cats, and it looks as though the illustrations are speed drawn from live cats. To be fair, if you like cats, this part might make you happy. It certainly made me laugh, because there's an illustration of a cat lying on its back, presenting its butt-hole to the viewer. No, I'm not kidding. It made me laugh because that's true to cats, but now you've been warned that there is illustrated cat a-hole in this book.

Shortly after the cat a-hole image, the artist's caffeine-and-sugar-fueled high subsides long enough to provide us with some nice, albeit boring compared to cat-butt, images of cat stamps. Yes, stamps. Like the kind you put on your mail. Totally useless to actually send mail, but nice. However, the trip into staid sanity is short-lived, and we return to madness (of the “what the hell is that cat doing?” variety) for a few more pages before the book simply ends.

This book is scattered. The cats in Paris portion is awfully short to have the whole book named after it, and the art style isn't consistently good. It isn't the worst coloring book in the world, but I know I'll enjoy my other coloring books far more. You might like this book if:
1. You like cats
2. You like weird stuff
3. You would like to color cat-related sketches.
If you're looking for Paris, look elsewhere. There isn't enough of it here to qualify.

This review is based on a copy provided by Blogging for Books in exchange for a fair and honest review.



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Quick Update: Doctor Who Big Bang Generation

I tried to get into this book. I really did. But after several weeks of slowly picking at it, I've made it halfway through the story and I just can't get myself to care about the characters or the plot. It's a fairly short book, and I'm not entirely certain where the problem lays.

• I like Dr. Who, but I don't live and breathe for the show. Maybe I'm not a big enough fan?
• I haven't watched much of the show beyond when David Tennant was the Doctor. Maybe I'm not caught up enough? This story has the newest Doctor in it and he doesn't show up for almost half of the book.
• Maybe I only like watching the show, instead of trying to read about wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey stuff. 

Whatever the case, I've made it halfway through and I still don't care, so I can't imagine it's going to get much better. I'll finish it, because I'm a completionist, but it'll be like eating your least favorite vegetable because you're just so used to cleaning off your plate. Doable, but not enjoyable. That being said, it isn't terrible, either. So don't be completely discouraged from trying this one out if you love the series. I think maybe it just wasn't for me.

This review is based on a free copy I received from Blogging for Books in exchange for a fair and honest review.

P.S. Last Minute Notes!

1. I will be off on vacation for the next view weeks, so there won't be any updates through most of January. Sorry!
2. I'm aware that my blog is doing strange and kooky things with this post. I don't know why. Several attempts to fix it have failed. Again, I'm sorry.
3. I'm going to try to finish this book and have a proper review for it next time, so stay tuned!

And that's it! See you guys next year! Happy New Year!

This is a marathon, not a sprint

Q&A a Day for Creatives: A 4-Year Journal by Potter Style

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


Ask yourself: Can I sketch 1,460 things over the course of four years? Of course you can. Will you?

Q&A a Day for Creatives is 366 pages of blank squares with short prompts begging for you to pick up your favorite medium and get doodling. The pages are set up into quarters, each featuring a spot to write the year so that you can remember when you started. The great thing about this is that if you draw only one thing every day, and that thing is in this book, as you start accumulating doodles throughout the years you will see how much you've progressed with time. Hence, it is a marathon, not a sprint! I think this is also a great way to take ten to fifteen minutes out of every day to unwind with a doodle.

Please note, this is not an Art workbook. It doesn't teach you to draw or demand that you use a specific medium. You can get as crazy (or not) as you want here, whether it be with pens, pencils, watercolors, or crayons. Personally, I think the pages lend themselves best to pencils, pens and crayons. The pages don't have enough tooth for pastels, nor are they thick enough for watercolors. If you don't know what "tooth" on paper is, you probably weren't planning on using pastels anyway, so no worries there.

If you're the type of person that gets overwhelmed by a large blank page, this book is for you! (Because the blanks are smaller, and it isn't totally blank anyway.) If you feel high internal pressure to create masterpieces, take a deep breath and doodle anyway because a lot of the prompts "call" for stick figures anyway. I look forward to doodling a day! Maybe it'll be the only thing I draw, and maybe as I work it'll warm me up for other things. Still, I'm ready to make a commitment to it! Give it a shot and happy sketching!



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This review is based on a free copy I received from Blogging for Books in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Grammar is Dead: Review of the Grave Man

The Grave Man-Mystery, Thriller by David Archer

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Warning: This book is a guilty pleasure!

Something you'll notice right away about The Grave Man is that either David Archer does not have an editor, or his editor doesn't give a shit. The entire book is riddled with misspellings, typos, misplaced spaces, and other generally obvious writing mistakes that could have been fixed if he had just read his own manuscript over. If you have an aversion to sloppy mistakes, or rough writing, this book is not for you.

The story itself is entertaining in a laughable and silly kind of way. Sam Pritchard, a former cop who is medically retired from duty, is asked by a neighbor for help in finding her missing granddaughter. Apparently the cops aren't wasting any time on this girl, and she needs help! Our hero sort of just shrugs his shoulders, reminds the woman that he is no longer a cop, but promises to look into it and let her know what he finds out. That's the last time this story makes much sense. In an effort to track down the girl, Sam tries to crack into the website the missing girl's drug-dealing father gets his work through. One of the many problems with that tactic, though, is that Sam is not a hacker. You know who is a hacker, though? Indiana!

Indiana? Jones?
Not Jones! Indiana is a young, single mother who graduated from M.I.T and cannot find work despite her excellent programming and back-door opening skills. She was, however, named after the bad-ass, whip-wielding Indy we all know and love.

Wait, Ly, where did this hacker come from? How does she play into the story?
I'm glad you asked, hypothetical speaker in my head. Sam quickly realizes that he does not have the skills necessary to find the missing girl's father through drug-dealer's Facebook, so he places an ad on craigslist. Thus, Indiana and her daughter are introduced. Shenanigans, double-crossings, and shoot-outs ensue, along with some out-of-place yet touching domestic moments when the homeless Indiana and her daughter move in with Sam.

The pacing is odd. Recall the shenanigans, double-crossings, and shoot-outs I just mentioned? They really are interspersed with these slower, sweet moments where Indiana and Sam are just being domestic. It felt out of place, and yet I liked how Archer wrote the budding romance. His characters don't just fall in love. They're a little shy around each other. They don't just hop into bed in a fit of passionate lust, then try to cram a relationship around a one-night stand afterwards. They're taking it slow and I found that sweet.

Why on earth did you give this book FOUR stars?
Because I enjoyed it and I'm the one rating it. I know full well that this book is not for everyone. The typos alone during the first 10 pages made me want to throw things. And then I realized it would go a lot better if I just stopped caring and naturally filled in the gaps myself. If I had paid money for this book, I might be more upset. That being said, I am actually willing (and planning) to spend money on the following book. I want to know where it goes. So if it's still available for free on Amazon, I highly encourage you to give it a shot. And even if it's not free, it's worth checking out. It's a short read. Even if you suffer, you won't suffer long.



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This part has nothing to do with the book and everything to do with the review.
Dear Readers,
I hope you've enjoyed this presentation of "What I Think of Books." My previous reviews felt too cut and dry, so henceforth I will be including more of my inner monologues for spice. I'm just letting you know: things might get silly.
You're welcome.

Happy Halloween! No tricks, all treats!

Hey guys!

It's Halloween! Yaaay! 

I was thinking that I'm maybe a little old to go trick-or-treating for candy, but I will never be too old to go trick-or-treating for free books through Amazon. Here's a list of free Halloween books I found. They are all free (as opposed to being on kindle unlimited which is part of their lending library that you have to pay for). At least, today they are. All of these books are currently rated on Amazon as having 4 or 5 stars. Please be aware that with the exception of Dracula, I have not read any of these. I will, however, likely post reviews of them sooner or later since I downloaded them all. So with that said...

Trick or treat! Smell my feet! Give me something good to read!

Classic Dracula

I'm going based on the title alone with this one: Psychosis. Thirteen short stories

Viral Zombies at Sea: Sea Sick

Serial Killer scary! Evangeline

Multiple authors, Halloween anthology: The Cat, the Crow, and the Cauldron: A Halloween Anthology

Horror that's funny: How to be Dead (The 'How To Be Dead' Grim Reaper Comedy Horror Series Book 1)

A little late to go to Hogwarts. Young adult paranormal comedy romance: Halloween Magic & Mayhem

Bonus Points: Joe Jill's Locke & Key is available as a free audiobook on Audible until November 4th! This is a 13 hour dramatized version, and my husband is going nuts over it. I have not listened to it or read the graphic novel yet, but I have heard nothing but good things about this. Doesn't hurt to snag it for free, so get to it!

I hope I found a treat or two that you'll like. Enjoy!